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A union between a Muslim and non-Muslim
Marriage

New MessageA union between a Muslim and non-Muslim (modified 0 times) jennifer
Hey everyone.

I'm a Malaysian who needs some advice. I have been dating a Muslim guy for almost 3 years now, and we love each other a lot. The problem is, I'm a Christian and my family doesn't know anything about our relationship because I knew my family will reject him. I just want to know:

1. Is it A MUST for me to convert to Islam if we were to marry each other

2. A friend of mine told me that her Muslim pal said that I could marry my boyfriend without converting, but the catch is our future children will have to follow their dad's religion..which is Islam. How true is that statement?

Some of my friends are concerned that if I were to convert, I won't have much privileges and I'll be at the losing end. At the same time, my boyfriend is the greatest guy ever and I really, really love him. The only thing that's standing in our way is our religions. I hope someone could clarify my doubts. Thank you.

07 Jul, 2009 00:35:12

New MessageRE:A union between a Muslim and non-Muslim (modified 0 times) LUCY
Hi Jennifer,

Have you got the solution? i m facing similar problem. the only different is my bf is chinese (sabah bumip). His IC has a muslim name. we are struggling about this issue. we decide to get married oversea but i worried about my future children.

22 Mar, 2010 13:54:49

New MessageRE:A union between a Muslim and non-Muslim (modified 0 times) SFKL
A fact. A non-muslim wishing to marry a Malaysian Muslim, whether male or female, the non-muslim must first convert to Muslim. No conversion,no marriage, potential khalwat case! A fact, So answer to question 1 is YES. UNLESS you plan to move out of Malaysia and never return, then it is possible.

2. A friend of mine told me that her Muslim pal said that I could marry my boyfriend without converting, but the catch is our future children will have to follow their dad's religion..which is Islam. How true is that statement?

I think that said muslim pal may be a foreigner who married another foreigner because that is impossible. The only situation where a muslim with a non-muslim together is where they were both non-muslim, married, have children and then one of them, for example the husband converts and the non-muslim refuses to convert. And no, the children in that situation is not obligated to follow the father's religion if the government's proposed changes takes effect. So the statement is misguided and wrong.

If your become a muslim and marries a muslim, yes the children will be muslims when they're born.

Some of my friends are concerned that if I were to convert, I won't have much privileges and I'll be at the losing end. At the same time, my boyfriend is the greatest guy ever and I really, really love him. The only thing that's standing in our way is our religions. I hope someone could clarify my doubts. Thank you.

Indeed love should be beyond religious beliefs so conversion is such an unnecessary thing but this is the law in Malaysia and so the sacrifice is on your part. On the other hand your boyfriend can renounce his religion BUT that would mean being ostracized by everyone and it will be a harder road for him to do that than for you to convert and then renounce it (and even then you have to convince the courts, Syariah or otherwise that you truly did not practice the religion the entire time). If you do love him as much as you say he does, then it is time to consider a change of religion on your part, not out of belief but out of legal necessity. You will be given a new IC with a new Muslim name too.

I hope this clarifies but may I stress that a Muslim woman may make a will but only towards a percentage of her property. Some must be distributed according to the law and whether you like it or not, you have no free will in that percentage. Your husband may marry a 2nd wife and either you divorce him or you put up with him. Custody isn't an issue since I notice syariah courts tend to favour mothers these days, however you will have to raise them as a muslim. There are many considerations to be made. I am not badmouthing the religion but when changing a religion has huge implications on changing one's legal rights, it is better you know what are your rights after conversion and be very sure. But since love conquers all, and hopefully you're sure he is THE ONE, consider taking the plunge as they say, only when you're very very very sure.

Lucy

Have you got the solution? i m facing similar problem. the only different is my bf is chinese (sabah bumip). His IC has a muslim name. we are struggling about this issue. we decide to get married oversea but i worried about my future children.

Lucy, please ask your boyfriend what is his religion. There are Christians Sabahans Chinese who bears muslim name so to speak. In Sabah it is a different situation in the sense you need not be a malay/muslim to be a bumiputra. They are given bumiputra status irrespective of their religion so yes, even if he has a muslim name so to speak, of his birth cert or some document says he is Christian for example, you can marry him without conversion since he is not a muslim.

But if he is, again the above reply is my answer. Even if you marry overseas, you will still need to register your marriage in Malaysia within 1 year if I remember correctly or face penalty. That is a small issue since it is only a fine. The bigger problem is khalwat where he can be sent to jail for an offence for being the same room with a woman because in the eyes of law both of you are not married or rather the marriage is not legal. Unless you plan to move overseas and never return, so called marrying elsewhere won't solve the problem. But Lucy yours is easier solved than Jennifer;s. So ask your boyfriend is he or is he not a muslim? For east malaysians, do not look at the name. I have seen so called malay/muslim names and they're christians.

Please do follow up so that I know the outcome. Best of luck to both of you.

24 Mar, 2010 11:49:50

New MessageRE:A union between a Muslim and non-Muslim (modified 0 times) Lucy
Hi SFKL,

Appreciate your reply. His IC has ISLAM word. So, i m not sure if this determine him as a muslim but he never practise. He always says he is a Christian. The birth cert has MOHAMMAD but no BIN (IC got both)and the tricky part is father name never has the BIN.

Do you mean as long as the birth cert show he is a christian, we can get married without me converting? If not, i would have to convert which my bf doesnt want me to. He said we can migrate but I m not sure when we able to do that. I m so clueless. What if we never get married and have children? Does it work? as long as we love each other? I don't mind of the marriage status. We can have traditional wedding.

Please advice which type of lawyer we should consult? Thanks in advance SFKL for your reply.

26 Mar, 2010 10:40:41

New MessageRE:A union between a Muslim and non-Muslim (modified 0 times) SFKL
You don't need to consult any lawyers just yet since we are talking marriage, not divorce.

If his IC says ISLAM, I am afraid conversion is a must. Since he doesn't practice and if his family is ok with it, has he consider renouncing the religion? It can be done but I have read it is a difficult process. This you would have to consult a syariah lawyer or the ones at the mosque, etc.

Do you mean as long as the birth cert show he is a christian, we can get married without me converting?
Yes that is what I mean

If not, i would have to convert which my bf doesnt want me to.
You have to because your marriage is then not recognised.

He said we can migrate
Which is an option. As long as you don't return to Malaysia to settle down, I believe it doesn't matter

What if we never get married and have children?
If he is a Muslim and does not renounce the religion, there is an issue of khalwat which is a serious offence.

and even in ordinary circumstances, he a christian, your child will be illegitimate. You will be his common law wife which has no effect in Malaysia since 1982. What does it mean? You will not have the benefit as a wife and your child can't inherit from him in situations where if he doesn't have a will. He will have to make a will stating clearly you and your child will benefit, EPF nominations must be in your name for you to benefit, etc. The legal implication only arises when he leaves you (but he must still maintain the child) or worse, when he dies without any will.

Please be aware traditional wedding does not make a wedding legal. There must be registration. If you really want to check if your fiance is a muslim or not for sure, I think you can check at JAKIM. They must have records unless the IC dept made a mistake at time of issuance which could happen. Then he must file an application to amend the religion in his IC. I don't think BIN is an indication of whether he is a muslim or not. I am not a syariah law expert so I can't answer that with conviction. I am more concern with his IC describing him as such. Is he from East malaysia or from West Malaysia?

26 Mar, 2010 11:13:00

New MessageRE:A union between a Muslim and non-Muslim (modified 0 times) Lucy
SFKL,

He was born at Sarawak. How to amend the religion in the IC as his name has the BIN. He said those ppl (during birth cert registration) simply decide the religion. When young, the mother tried to change but nobody attend to it or she didn't put much efforts. Now, we have to suffer to such mistake. For your information, the mother had a muslim name but already changed back to chinese due to divorce 15 years ago. However, his birth cert still showing the mother muslim name.

He is more than wiling to renounce. The problem is whether allow to do so. He never ever practise. Even though i convert, we can't get married also as both of us cannot read quran. Don't know how true is this. I read many forums and mostly are negative replies. It is easy to convert but not for renounce.

I have no idea where to find syariah law expert, is it safe to speak out????

26 Mar, 2010 17:54:55

New MessageRE:A union between a Muslim and non-Muslim (modified 0 times) GIVING SOME ADVICE
Dear Jennifer

If he a muslim absoulutely you need to convert to marry him this is practised in our Islamic law and in Malaysia as well. In this case you need to refer a mulim which expert in syariah. You may walk to any nearest pejabat agama islam to seek some advice. I beleive they better advice.

28 Apr, 2010 16:29:16

New MessageRE:A union between a Muslim and non-Muslim (modified 0 times) John
I have a further question. What if I were to have children with a Muslim but registered only as single parent? Is that possible?
30 Jun, 2010 22:22:45

New MessageRE:A union between a Muslim and non-Muslim (modified 0 times) Vince
Hi all, my problem is slightly different from everyones, i met this lady who was born a Chinese and has been practicing Buddhism all these while, but when she was young, her parents got divorced and she was living with her mom and her mom converted her at the age of 12, right after she got her first ic ( and she has been carrying it till now and she's 30 ). Since then, she has been paying someone from NRD to still maintain her birth name as well as being a Chinese in her passport. Her problems only started recently when her passport expired and she has to renew it through proper channels this time. Of course,it now states that she is a muslim and she was given new muslim name. Is there anyway she can renounce islam? Her whole life, she has been a chinese and practicing buddhism and within 24 hours, shes a muslim with a new name. I have been advised and given a lot of opinions on what our rights are but as much as i appreciate it, we are not the 'system'.
If all fails, we are planning to give up everything here (since they already took away 30 years of her life) and leave the country. Can renouncing a religion and citizenship be done overseas? What else can we do? Please help...

Thank you

04 Mar, 2011 20:34:05


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